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GA Review

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Reviewing
This review is transcluded from Talk:Mobius Final Fantasy/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: IDV (talk · contribs) 01:30, 30 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I'll be doing this one.--IDVtalk 01:30, 30 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Lead

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  • The game features gameplay elements from previous Final Fantasy, This isn't quite right. I assume it's "from previous Final Fantasy titles". Also, link Final Fantasy.
  • "fast travel systems" should be fast-travel systems. This should be changed when it appears later in the article, too
  • Should "job" really be capitalized?
  • You don't need to add a ref to the release date in the infobox since the date is sourced further down.

Gameplay

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  • Link role-playing game
  • It being optimized for phones sounds more like development than gameplay
  • Players can [...] adjust the controls for right or left-handed players. - this repetition of players seems weird. Change it to something like "adjust the controls based on their dominant hand."
  • Does field map need to be capitalized? Same goes for other gameplay systems like "Ability" and "Break Gauge"
( I don't see anything saying that break gauge needs to be capitalized, but ability and elements seem to be capitalized terms when the game is described, so I left those capitalized.)
  • "elemental Elements" sounds really weird and should be rewritten
  • The caption for the screenshot is quite long, stretching all the way into "development" on my screen.
(it was probably because of the very thin and long shape of the screenshot. I trimmed it and got rid of seemingly unnecessary capitalization, let me know if you'd like me to cut more.)

Plot

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  • Is this all there is to the plot? I haven't played Mobius, so I don't know for sure, but it seems more like the game's premise.
  • I don't know what a "moogle" is. You should either explain or link to another FF article on WP that explains it.

Development

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  • so Kitase sought to fill this perceived gap in the market. You haven't mentioned Kitase yet outside the lead, so his full name and role should be added here.
  • the story is connected to the original Final Fantasy, though is not a remake and shares no direct connection. So what kind of connection does it share with it then?

Release

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  • A trademark for its original title, "Mevius Final Fantasy", was filed by Square Enix in October 2014.[18] The game was officially announced in an issue of Famitsu in December of the same year under the title Mevius Final Fantasy. A bit of repetition here, with "Mevius" being the original title being mentioned twice.Also, "in an issue of Famitsu" could be simplified to "in Famitsu"
  • Link localization to Video game localization
  • The hepburn for chapter 5's Japanese title should be "Dai Goshō: Hajimari no Senshi"

Reception

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Discussion

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@Judgesurreal777: This article is pretty good, but has some issues, the largest being how the plot summary only seems to cover the game's premise. I'll be putting this  On hold for now while awaiting fixes.--IDVtalk 12:34, 30 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@IDV: OK, it's all set now. I was able to expand the plot a bunch, and all the material I could find was included. I also incorporated your references. Let me know if there's anything else you want to see done! Judgesurreal777 (talk) 21:35, 31 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]
@Judgesurreal777: I'll be honest, I don't really know if I can pass this article with the plot section being the way it is right now, even with the expansions you did. I did find this playlist of the cutscenes in the game - if you could get help from someone fluent, you could expand the plot section further with it. Perhaps you could ask on the video game/Square Enix/Japan WikiProjects.--IDVtalk 22:43, 31 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]
Good point, I will ask for some assistance to see if we can get the plot fuller. Judgesurreal777 (talk) 22:45, 31 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]
I think I got the story, using multiple translation tools and comparing, this is the story of Wol's quest to fight chaos. @IDV: Judgesurreal777 (talk) 00:38, 1 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]
@Judgesurreal777: While not the most in-depth plot section, for understandable reasons, I think it's substantial enough by now to pass. Congrats, and good job!--IDVtalk 00:46, 1 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]
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