Template:Did you know nominations/Kingdom of al-Abwab
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:19, 16 December 2018 (UTC)
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Kingdom of al-Abwab
[edit]... that in the late 13th century, the Mamluk Sultanate not only vassalized Makuria but also the more southerly Kingdom of al-Abwab, thus extending its nominal authority deep into what is now Sudan?Source: Yusuf Fadl Hasan (1967): "The Arabs and the Sudan. From the seventh to the early sixteenth century"
Improved to Good Article status by LeGabrie (talk). Nominated by LeGabrie (talk) at 19:21, 5 November 2018 (UTC).
@LeGabrie: The article is a recently promoted GA. It is extensively sourced to offline sources. My one concern is the hook. It is dense, close to the character limit, and may not be interesting to people without knowledge of African history; I know I found it rather dry myself. I believe this is your second DYK nomination, so you do not need a QPQ. (By the way, I also bolded the article title per convention.) Raymie (t • c) 05:29, 7 November 2018 (UTC)
- @Raymie: Let's be honest: a lot of the DYK hooks are very special and not interesting to everybody. Just check this one from today's front page: "...that Roman Twardy conducted the Wiesbadener Knabenchor in the first recording of a rediscovered Passion oratorio by Johann Mattheson?" I know neither Roman Twardy nor the Wiesbadener Knabenchor nor Johann Mattheson. Concerning my hook we have the problem that al-Abwab is a hyper-obscure kingdom, so I tried to link it to more famous states, like Makuria and especially the Mamluks, who everyone with basic knowledge in crusader history should know. Perhaps we can rephrase the hook a bit to decrease the word count. LeGabrie (talk) 11:20, 7 November 2018 (UTC)
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Hi, I came by to promote this, and had some trouble verifying the hook fact because the word "vassalize" isn't being used in the article. When I figured out what that meant, I wondered why you're not making the article topic the subject of your hook? Yoninah (talk) 18:58, 12 December 2018 (UTC)
- @Yoninah: As explained above I tried to link the kingdom of al-Abwab to more famous states to reach a wider audience. Maybe you like this alternative better: ALT1:"
... that the Sudanese Kingdom of al-Abwab was a close ally of the Mamluk Sultanate?"LeGabrie (talk) 19:33, 12 December 2018 (UTC)- @LeGabrie: yes, I read what you wrote above. ALT1 is punchier, but will it appeal to a general audience? Perhaps if you show how he was an ally, like that part about handing over the disobedient king, it would work better. Yoninah (talk) 22:40, 12 December 2018 (UTC)
- ALT2:"
...that in 1276, the Sudanese Kingdom of al-Abwab captured king David of Makuria and handed him over to the Mamluk Sultanate?"LeGabrie (talk) 16:02, 13 December 2018 (UTC)- @LeGabrie: Sorry, that doesn't seem so hooky. What about:
- ALT3: ... that as an ally of the Mamluk Sultanate, the Kingdom of al-Abwab provided an Assassin to watch over the Mamluk puppet king in Dongola? Yoninah (talk) 22:03, 13 December 2018 (UTC)
- ALT2:"
- @Yoninah: As explained above I tried to link the kingdom of al-Abwab to more famous states to reach a wider audience. Maybe you like this alternative better: ALT1:"
