Talk:Hollywood A.D./GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Glimmer721 (talk · contribs) 16:28, 8 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Will review soon. Glimmer721 ^talk 16:28, 8 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Comments:

"...the attempted murder of a Cardinal O'Fallon at his church". It should be either "the Cardinal O'Fallon" or "a Cardinal". Also, clarify whose church it is--Skinner's or Federman's?
Charles Burks points to List of minor The X-Files characters, but there isn't a section for him there.
"Mulder visits Cardinal O'Fallon, who admits..." Wait. I thought Cardinal O'Fallon was murdered?
"...the man comes back to life on the operating table, but when Scully looks down he is back on the operating table." This could be made clearer; maybe just say that Scully did not notice he came back to life.
"...hinting at the continued romantic relationship between Mulder and Scully that has been hinted at in the last few episodes." Change one of the hints.
Give Spotniz's title (executive producer, etc.)
"a smart, intelligent, quirky, and intelligent idea" I know this is a direct quote, but you may want to edit it to avoid repition that doesn't add anything. Maybe "a smart, intelligent, quirky...idea".
"Assistant director Barry K. Thomas was cast as Sugar Bear" The character of Sugar Bear isn't mentioned in the plot, so who is he?
"Several of the family members and friends cast by Duchovny able to apply for their Screen Actor's Guild card as well as apply for a health insurance plan". Missing a word here...is it supposed to be "were able"?
"nudge-nudge, wink-wink writing-directin" Is that supposed to be "directing"?

Looks good other than those small things. I made a few small fixes as well. Thanks for reviewing my articles, by the way! Glimmer721 ^talk 20:01, 8 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

OK, I believe I've addressed all the issues. The only one I didn't change was the second issues about O'Fallon. He wasn't murdered, but an attempt on his life was made, unsuccessfully.--Gen. Quon (talk) 23:02, 8 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry, did I miss the "attempted"? My bad. Passing... Glimmer721 ^talk 23:59, 8 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]