Talk:D.Va/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 21:35, 31 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Hello! I'll be taking a look at this article for the January 2022 GAN backlog drive. If you haven't already signed up, please feel free to join in! Although QPQ is not required, if you're feeling generous, I also have a list of GA nominations of my own right here.

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()

3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Infobox and lede

"who appears in the 2016 video game Overwatch—a first-person shooter that was developed by Blizzard Entertainment—and related animations and literary media." → "developed by Blizzard Entertainment for their 2016 first-person shooter video game Overwatch, as well as related animations and literary media."
Make "multiplayer" lowercase
Comma after "voiced by Charlet Chung"
Make "tank" lowercase and link to Tank (gaming) like you do in the body
"and has been seen" → "and has been praised"

all

DoneSoulbust (talk) 08:44, 7 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Development and design

D.Va, along with Genji and Mei, in October 2015 at BlizzCon; missing phrase
Chung is mentioned here but Risa Taneda is not
"if it sustained" → "if the suit sustained"
Jeff Kaplan said D.Va's buffs would take longer to develop and implement. What this would "take longer than" should be made explicit
Combine the paragraph with "The character's ultimate ability" into the one before, since they both address the same topic
"soak up damage" → "absorb damage"
"that they must account for" → "for which they must account"

Done I removed Risa Taneda from the article (I don't know if Japanese VA needs to be included since this is an English wiki article about American game; for example, if we include Japanese VAs, what's stopping us from listing all dubs' VAs?) I also feel like the "take longer to develop and implement" portion was already rather clear based on the usage of a semicolon. Idk, i made the change anyway, but it seemed rather clear if not exactly 100% explicit. Soulbust (talk) 08:50, 7 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Gameplay

"typically" is a common enough word that it doesn't have to be quoted; as it stands, it breaks up the flow of the sentence

DoneSoulbust (talk) 08:53, 7 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Appearances

Overwatch

No comma needed after "at age 16"
I think "Control" in "control map" should be lowercase, but ignore me if it's a specific term that's always capitalized in the lore

Heroes of the Storm

spell out MOBA since the acronym was not introduced in the body

Other appearances

Good

Done Not sure if control needs to capitalized. It's a type of game mode, so maybe but idk. I lowercased it for now. Soulbust (talk) 08:57, 7 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Reception

""queer [and] aimed at the game's LGBT fanbase."" → ""queer [and] aimed at the game's LGBT fanbase"." per MOS:LQ
"FAMERZ—a group of South Korean Overwatch players that support women's and LGBTQ rights—which was formed to protest against former South Korean President Park Geun-hye." → "FAMERZ, a group of South Korean Overwatch players that support women's and LGBTQ rights which was formed to protest against former South Korean President Park Geun-hye."
No commas needed around both due to her South Korean nationality
The Geguri connection is not presently made clear to me, someone unfamiliar with the accusations
No commas needed around "generally"
Most importantly: the positive female model for young gamers aspect is not made clear in this section.

Done. I also removed the Geguri section as per the comments/discussion on the GA review by ᴢxᴄᴠʙɴᴍ and Reiro. I think that information and the Korean-language source could be very useful and helpful over on the Geguri article. Soulbust (talk) 09:07, 7 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

References

Good

General comments

One fair use and one CC image, both relevant
No stability concerns in the revision history
Outside of mirrors, Copyvio score looks good

Putting on hold to allow nominator to address comments. Please feel free to ping me with questions, and let me know when you're finished! — Ghost River 15:28, 1 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Well, I am not knowing well about GA cycles, and glad to see that D.Va is nominated, but this article has a serious error on BLP issue; Geguri stated that she would not like to connect her problem with feminism. I am Korean, and I know well on this. She had been suspected to cheating, and proved her ability throughout her performance on Inven broadcast, which is set to test her. However, some feminists, including "National D.Va Association" (전디협) claimed that she was attacked because she is a female gamer. Their statement made Geguri embarrassed and upset, she apparently noticed that the problem she already had is not about feminism. Later, National D.Va Association apologized to her.[1](Korean news)

It looks like that, in English community, Korean sources are not spread broadly. I hope to reflect her opinion and that news above, in appropriate due. Thank you. Reiro (talk) 07:00, 2 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Maybe that entire sentence could just be removed. First of all it's pretty obvious that both the group and D.Va are South Korean, and the Geguri information is outdated and - since I assume they still use D.Va as a role model, not an intrinsic part of why they picked her. Then that paragraph could possibly be merged with the one below where they criticize some of the skins. ᴢxᴄᴠʙɴᴍ (ᴛ) 12:16, 2 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Zxcvbnm: Thank you for your answer. Do you mean that the contents I suggested have not context in this article, and are more appropriate to include Geguri? And I mistook; National D.Va Association is former name of FAMERZ.--Reiro (talk) 15:41, 2 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Soulbust I have made several additional changes to address remaining comments and some cosmetic tweaks. Thank you for your patience as I dealt with several health issues. Passing now. — Ghost River 18:05, 18 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]

GhostRiver, It's all good and I hope you're feeling better now. Thank you for the help with this! Best wishes, Soulbust (talk) 01:34, 19 February 2022 (UTC)[reply]