Talk:Charles H. Jordan

Charles H. Jordan was nominated as a History good article, but it did not meet the good article criteria at the time (August 4, 2023, reviewed version). There are suggestions on the review page for improving the article. If you can improve it, please do; it may then be renominated.

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Death date

User:FromCzech you added a specific death date to the infobox, but I don't think anyone knows exactly on what day he died. Do you agree? CT55555 (talk) 11:27, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I didn't delve too deeply into the topic. I copied it from the CZE wiki, where there is a citation, and I saw this source too. FromCzech (talk) 11:34, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I used the same source for some biographical details, but the circumstances of his death are unclear. I think a sensible reading of the sources suggested he was murdered sometime between going missing and the discovery of his body, but the exact dates are unknown. I think we can only say August, not 16 August. I think we should change it to that, but I am not good with the formatting you have used. Would you be willing to make that change? CT55555 (talk) 11:42, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

August is too vague. I think it is enough to elaborate in the text that it is the probable date of death or make a footnote. I believe that even then they were able to estimate the time of death when the specific date is written there. FromCzech (talk) 11:58, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I think if you read the story, you will see that it is not possible to know the probably date. He was probably abducted on the evening of the 16th and then probably interrogated at the Egyptian embassy. But his body was only found on the 21st, so he could have died on the 16th, 17th, 18th, 19th, 20th or 21st. I have read all the sources on the circumstances and none say a date other than the source you linked, which is the website of his employer. The same website state that he was murdered with a degree of confidence that no other source states, it is not an independent source (although I think it is ok to use for non controversial details). An investigation into his death has been requested many times over the decades, it is clear there are unknown details, including when he died. CT55555 (talk) 12:03, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, I changed the date. But his body was found on 20 August and the autopsy was made on 21, according to all the sources I've read, so I corrected it. The source you cited is not available for free, and can contain a mistake. FromCzech (talk) 12:23, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

All my sources were available for free thought the Wikipedia Library. Most users have free access if you sign up. I recommend it. CT55555 (talk) 12:58, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for making the change. CT55555 (talk) 12:58, 16 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Images

@FromCzech I think I added an image from the street they lived in in Prague, but you deleted it and the edit summary said disruptive? Did I add the wrong street, or is there some other reason you felt this was disruptive? Likewise, the photo of the river where his body was found seems like a reasonable image to use, but obviously you disagree, can you say why? CT55555 (talk) 13:32, 18 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

You added Dlouhá street in Břehy (Pardubice District), and not in Prague, which you also admitted in the description, you I removed it. The image of the rive has no purpose here; who want to know how the river look, goes to the Vltava page. The image of the hotel was too low placed and therefore disruptive, I moved it to the place where the Vltava originally was. FromCzech (talk) 17:18, 18 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Ah, I made an error with the street. Thanks for correcting. CT55555 (talk) 18:05, 18 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

GA Review

Unsuccessful. voorts (talk/contributions) 19:38, 4 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

This review is transcluded from Talk:Charles H. Jordan/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Voorts (talk · contribs) 19:18, 4 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewing for August 2023 backlog drive. I am quickfailing this nom. The narrative of the article is disjointed and the organization does not follow MOS:LAYOUT, particularly MOS:BODY. A few sections are one or two sentences long, which fails MOS:PARA. Additionally, dividing the article into sections regarding facts that were learned following the subject's death, rather than incorporating those facts into sections about different periods of his life, does not make much sense. The lead is also far too long per MOS:LEADLENGTH.

The article also has some sourcing issues. The only non-newspaper secondary sources are: (1) a bio from the organization of which the subject was a part (the American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee [1]), which is arguably biased; and (2) a journal article ([2]), which is only cited once for a minor fact about the subject.

The article also has some too-close paraphrases ([3]), but I'm not sure it rises to the level of a copyright violation.

Finally, the article requires another copy edit. For example: Jordan was born in the United States, moved to Germany as a child, and fled Germany for Prague after a Nazi attack before returning to the United States.; After being attacked by her Nazi brother in 1933, the couple fled as refugees to Prague and lived in Dlouhá Street..

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.