Talk:Crystal Pite/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Chiswick Chap (talk · contribs) 08:17, 13 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

This article has been brought from a rough state to something that looks quite reasonable at first glance: sensibly structured, every paragraph cited, a mix of sources from newspapers and ballet companies. There has been a very welcome burst of activity to add suitable citations, which have strengthened the article.

However, something is not quite right here. The majority of the text is basically a list of small chunks about Pite's pieces, with very little depth about her, her style, her thought, her life. This isn't made better by the lists at the end of the article, which largely repeat facts from the text above. The citations, too, are mainly about the pieces, with little in the way of a deeper look at Pite and a wider context (her whole career, what influenced her, what influence she has had, her place in the world of contemporary dance).

I see that the article failed GA back in 2015. The reviewer noted that there were some readily fixable issues with the text and a few missing citations (there still are), but

Overall - I think my biggest issue is the depth of coverage of each of her pieces. The article is greatly expanded by the length of discussion on many or her pieces. I looked at other GA articles in the dance project, such as Kenneth MacMillan, Arthur Sullivan, Jacques Offenbach, Misty Copeland, and Sergei Prokofiev - none of those articles goes into anywhere near the depth that this article does on the artist's individual pieces. To me, that makes the article less about her, and more about the pieces. I think this is a major roadblock to passing GA.
— GA review 1, 2015

Well, that's still true in 2019, and I couldn't have put it better: it says exactly what I wished to say about the article. What is needed to fix this, I think, is to

cut down on the talk about individual pieces
beef up the account of her life and thought
(and crucially) cite good secondary sources (books and published academic papers on modern ballet) and tertiary sources (encyclopedias...) on Pite's career, thinking, choreography, style, and contribution to the art, comparing her with other choreographers and evaluating her work.

Minor comments

Some items require citations, both in the text ~~and in the lists.~~

Some citations are spaced from the text and followed by punctuation; I've fixed some for you.

There is some inconsistency of spelling, e.g. "Netherlands Dance Theater" vs "Nederlands Dans Theatre" (they actually use Nederlands Dans Theater about themselves, so I'd suggest we go with that).

There is some overlinking. I've tidied it up a bit for you.

"In 2010, Kidd Pivot became the resident dance company" ... or perhaps she didn't. Needs name of her role.

"When her arrangement with de:Künstlerhaus_Mousonturm expired" ... needs an inter-language link. Follow the link to see the required syntax.

Summary

This is not an immediate fail, as the article has merit and with work can be brought to GA standard. I am happy to engage in a creative dialogue on improving the article, which I think will be necessary in this case. That will demand energy and enthusiasm, and since that looks to be available, there is a good prospect of success here. There is no time limit, as long as there is a clear and demonstrated commitment and work continues at a reasonable pace. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:17, 13 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Zochawk - a week has passed with no sign of activity on this task, nor any indication of your intentions for it. Could you please let me know how you would like to proceed with it. Many thanks, Chiswick Chap (talk) 15:05, 20 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Well, with no indication of any intention to proceed, despite edits being made on other topics, I must reluctantly conclude that this particular project isn't going anywhere, so I'll end it now. Chiswick Chap (talk) 13:53, 23 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]