Template:Did you know nominations/Khetcho

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Hawkeye7 (talk) 19:45, 18 September 2014 (UTC)

Khetcho

(

• Back to T:TDYK
• Article history

)

• ... that prior to the start of World War I, Khetcho (pictured), a member of the Armenian Revolutionary Federation, was tasked to acquire armaments to support Armenian self-defense efforts?

• ALT1: ... that the Armenian combatant Khetcho (pictured) severely fractured his chin during a battle?

Created by EtienneDolet (talk). Self nominated at 17:49, 4 September 2014 (UTC).

• Reviewed: Paul Emile Diou

• Thank you for creating this article. Length, date, ALT1 hook verified. Well-referenced; all non-lede paragraphs have refs; all refs appear to be RS. No apparent close-paraphrasing issues. Image is from Commons. QPQ done. ALT1 GTG. --Rosiestep (talk) 15:30, 7 September 2014 (UTC)

• The ALT1 hook, which was promoted, just doesn't reflect the facts. The phrase "severely fractured his chin during a battle" indicates to me that Khetcho did it to himself somehow, and with perhaps several breaks. What the source says is "was severely wounded by a bullet which shattered his chin", which means that it was enemy fire that did it, and the bone was shattered (into many fragments) while the wound itself (involving holes in flesh) was severe. Please come up with a new, accurate hook. (I can't see enough of the source to determine whether "an encounter with Rahim Khan" would actually be appropriately described as a "battle".) Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 20:32, 16 September 2014 (UTC)
• ... that prior to the start of World War I, Khetcho (pictured), a member of the Armenian Revolutionary Federation, was tasked to acquire armaments to support Armenian self-defense efforts?

Alright I'll add the original hook since its well-referenced and may be more in tune with the source. Rosiestep, please let me know what you think. Étienne Dolet (talk) 23:02, 16 September 2014 (UTC)

@EtienneDolet: Instead of the original hook, which I didn't care for, could you rephrase the chin hook? Thanks. --Rosiestep (talk) 04:16, 17 September 2014 (UTC)

ALT2: ... that while in battle, Khetcho's (pictured) chin was severely fractured due to a bullet wound?

@Rosiestep: Please see ALT2. Étienne Dolet (talk) 17:57, 17 September 2014 (UTC)

ALT3: ... that Armenian activist Khetcho's (pictured) jawbone was shattered by a bullet before he fought in the First World War?

Weird to have a chin fractured. Surely it was his jawbone? Victuallers (talk) 20:01, 17 September 2014 (UTC)

• Victuallers, as I pointed out above, the source says his chin was shattered by a bullet. Not fractured. In my view, the new ALTs have the same basic problem that ALT1 had. BlueMoonset (talk) 20:15, 17 September 2014 (UTC)
• BlueMoonset Goody, shattered is much more hooky, do feel free to edit these hooks. I have made your suggested change. Victuallers (talk) 20:21, 17 September 2014 (UTC)

ALT4: ... that the jawbone of Armenian activist Khetcho (pictured) was shattered by a bullet during a battle? Étienne Dolet (talk) 22:07, 17 September 2014 (UTC)

ALT4 GTG. Not only do I like "shattered", but I like the proximity of "bullet" to "battle". --Rosiestep (talk) 03:03, 18 September 2014 (UTC)